In times of economic uncertainty, good information can be an invaluable commodity. So we’ve been working on a way to channel it to you. For many people, knowing what to do in our radically changing economy is like trying to figure out what to do when the power in your house stops working. You’re at … Read more
Silly reality show? Sure. A case study for evidence-based relationship science? Okay! Holly Dixon analyses the relationships of Married at First Sight Australia. Married at First Sight is a microcosm of what we all experience in interpersonal relationships, albeit at a concentration many of us will not have experienced. The intensity of the MAFS experiment ensures … Read more
Kristen Joiner reflects on what she wants her teenage sons to know about life in this new world they’re growing up in. It’s 2018. Thank God. From Donald Trump comparing the size of his button with Kim Jong-un’s, to Harvey Weinstein and #MeToo, 2017 was a doozy of a year. Hopefully it will turn out to … Read more
In the second instalment of our new advice column Is it Normal? – a place for parents to ask experts the questions they Google at 2am – a nutritionist advises the parent of a very fussy eater. Spinoff Parents editor Emily Writes: Since Is it Normal’s debut last week your questions have rolled in and … Read more
As we drag ourselves through the final stretch of January, Don Rowe asks one sleep expert how can we get some desperately needed shut-eye. This post was first published in January 2018 Last night I dreamed I was back in high school, lacing up my boots to run out for the first XV in a … Read more
Almost every sleep-deprived parent is used to the ‘smile and nod’ when they’re given unsolicited advice. Linda Jane Keegan is over it. Here she tells us why. Sometimes I can’t tell if I’m just being overly sensitive to idle parenting-related chitchat or if people really are subtly pushing unsolicited advice. It feels like as parents … Read more
In her quest for good parenting advice, Thomasin Sleigh has asked Google, skulked around online forums and, of course, become a devoted fan of The Spinoff Parents. But what are the pros and cons of turning to the internet for parenting tips? There’s a great quote by the French philosopher Gilles Deleuze which I came … Read more
Every pregnant person has struggled with unsolicited advice and comments on their body. Spinoff Parents columnist and mum of two Thalia Kehoe Rowden has tips and ways to reply to well-meaning strangers who are overstepping or oversharing. It starts early. You’ve seen two lines on a pregnancy test. Your body is GROWING A PERSON! What … Read more
Advice columnist Ms X helps a reader who suspects she’s been the unwitting subject of a secret sex tape. Dear Ms X I had something happen that was creepy but I don’t know if I should be worried. I am too embarrassed to tell my friends though so thought you might help. I met someone … Read more
Tis the season to be jolly? Oh fa-la-la-la-f**k off. If you hate Christmas, in-house therapist Ms X feels your pain and has some tips for getting through the season. Dear Ms X, I simply hate Christmas. I would much prefer if we went around singing summer songs, instead of carols. How simple would it be … Read more
What gives people the idea that they’re entitled to comment on your weight, or your appearance, or your eating habits? Our in-house therapist helps one reader deal with the endless unsolicited opinions. Dear Ms X, I am in a bit of a rage and I need to work out why before I go all blood … Read more
When does heavy social media use become a problem? In-house therapist Ms X discusses good and bad Facebook usage, and strategies for breaking the network’s vice-like hold on your day-to-day life. This week I talk to a reader who asked for advice on escaping the sticky grip of social media. Our caller reported that he … Read more
Is being a super serene person a sign of good mental health – or does it mean you’re a secret sociopath? In-house therapist Ms X weighs in. Hi Ms. X, I was the creepy baby that never cried. All my life I’ve been the super calm one in my family, friend group and relationships – … Read more
Being forced to socialise with the person who broke your heart is hard enough at the best of times, says in-house counsellor Ms X – but mix in end-of-year emotion and plenty of alcohol and you’ve got a combustible situation. Kia ora Ms X. I recently had my heart broken and I’m seeking your advice. … Read more
A new baby can be hell on your romantic relationship, but it doesn’t have to be. The secret? It’s really no great secret: communication, and lots of it, says Leigh-ann Griffiths. Meet Leigh-ann Griffiths, our new Spinoff Parents Relationships Expert. She’s got three kids and is a trained counsellor. She’s no-nonsense but she’s compassionate too. … Read more
In-house counsellor Ms X shares some tips on how to flat with your grown-up kids – without killing each other. Dear Ms X, Do children ever leave home anymore? Ever? Seriously. I have a 22 year old and a 19 year old and neither of them look like budging from the family home. I understand … Read more
In this week’s advice column: how to deal with losing your job without losing your shit. Dear Ms X I think I might be about to be made redundant and I am basically shitting myself. I am 29 and this would be the second lay off I have been through if it actually happens. I … Read more
Lack of libido is not just a female issue, says our in-house therapist Ms X – and doing nothing is only going to make the problem worse. Dear Ms X, My boyfriend and I have been together for two years now and we’ve stopped having sex as much as we used to – I’m talking … Read more
Online dating brings with it a whole heap of questions about expectations and etiquette, not least the vexed issue of sexting. Should I? Must I? Ms X has some advice. Dear Ms X, My six year relationship has just ended. This is obviously very difficult and I need counselling on a number of levels including … Read more
This week, a teenage special: Ms. X dishes out advice to a uni student with a crush on an older guy, and to a teen girl sick of hearing her sister have loud sex. Hello Ms. X, I am a 17 year old girl and I have two problems. So I have a twin sister … Read more
This week Ms X advises a letter writer who can’t stand her flatmate – but suspects she might be the problem, not him. Hi Ms X, I have a weird dilemma about my flatmate and would love some advice. Our new flatmate has been living with us for a few months now, and I don’t … Read more
Trained psychotherapist and resident advice guru Ms X on shitty jobs and the fine art of knowing when to walk away. Hi Ms X, I’ve been working in a new job for about 10 months now. It’s my first one out of uni and when I started it was quite enjoyable. The woman who hired … Read more
In-house psychotherapist Ms. X has some good advice for couples stuck in the fight/make up/fight rut. Hey Ms. X, This is such a cool idea first of all! I tried to start an advice column at my uni mag but it didn’t work. I guess I’m the one who should be getting advice, not giving … Read more
In this week’s advice column, in-house psychotherapist Ms. X helps out a concerned big sister. Dear Ms. X, I am a 21 year old woman needing some help with how to advise my younger sister about sex stuff. She is nearly 16 and has a 17 year old boyfriend. You can probably imagine what my … Read more
In-house psychotherapist Ms X helps out a senior rugby administrator in an apology-shaped pickle. Dear Ms X, I’m having a bit of a problem getting people to believe I really am sorry about a thing that maybe happened. I didn’t actually do the thing that was bad, but I’m in charge of the people that … Read more
There’s no reason to feel guilty about pulling the plug on a toxic friendship, says in-house psychotherapist Ms X. Dear Ms X, I’m writing to ask about maybe letting go of a long friendship. I’ve been friends with “Kate” for about a decade, since we were angsty teens in desperate need of some solid emotional … Read more
This week Ms. X tackles a problem familiar to every coupled-up cat-owner in the country: why does it insist on staring at us while we’re getting down to business? Hi there What do you do with your cat while you’re having sex? If we leave ours in the room it sits beside the bed and … Read more
Racists, body shamers and wannabe pickup artists: This week, Ms. X shares some terrible Tinder profiles supplied by you, her readers. Hello Callers, Cast your minds back a few weeks, when I butted into a Tinder conversation between reader ‘Linda’ and a gentleman whom I christened, for admittedly obscure reasons, ‘Guilty Denver’. Seemingly inspired by … Read more
This week, psychotherapist Ms X advises a single woman who finds herself suddenly “sexual catnip” to her coupled friends. Dear Ms X, I’m a happily single woman in my early 30s. I have no boyfriend or girlfriend, no kids, no commitments and it’s wonderful. I do what I want. I am living the dream. The … Read more