Summer reissue: Less than half of New Zealand adults have a will. One hundred per cent of New Zealand adults die. Sam Brooks writes on why you need a will. First published February 29, 2020. Before you read any further, ask yourself this one question: If I dropped dead right now, reading this piece, would … Read more
Summer reissue: You might be trying to reduce your carbon footprint in everyday life, but what about in death? Alex Casey talks to Becs Bartells, founder of Outside the Box about creating the perfect cardboard casket. First published February 27 2020 Becs Bartells often forgets she has an empty coffin sitting in the back of … Read more
Dr James Jap regularly watches people die. He talks to Michelle Langstone about how working in palliative care has shaped his outlook, his family, and his wardrobe. James Jap had never seen anyone die until his fourth year of medical school. On an overnight shift with St John’s ambulance, he was called out to the … Read more
From managing the expectations of friends and whānau to making sure there’s enough PPE, Jihee Junn talks to an Auckland-based funeral director about what their job has been like under Covid-19. More than 400 people are said to have died during New Zealand’s first week under level four lockdown. Only one had a direct connection … Read more
Less than half of New Zealand adults have a will. One hundred per cent of New Zealand adults die. Sam Brooks writes on why you need a will. Before you read any further, ask yourself this one question: If I dropped dead right now, reading this piece, would my loved ones know exactly – to … Read more
You might be trying to reduce your carbon footprint in everyday life, but what about in death? Alex Casey talks to Becs Bartells, founder of Outside the Box about creating the perfect cardboard casket. Becs Bartells often forgets she has an empty coffin sitting in the back of her station wagon, which can make for … Read more
Sometimes death comes for the old, and sometimes for the young. And sadly, like life, it rarely makes much sense when it does come. It was 8.45 am and my phone was vibrating. Ella’s name flashed on the screen. The call was probably a mistake, an accidental pocket-dial, I thought. We usually text each other … Read more
Yep, there’s a book of the TV show and yep, it’s just as wonderful. In this extract, funeral director Francis Tipene explains why you don’t need to splurge on send-offs, how he keeps his act together – and why he cringes when people talk about ‘closure’. Funerals don’t need to be expensive. People can choose … Read more
Huge claims from Uther Dean about The Wicked + The Divine, the books he’s spent the last five years with. The Wicked + The Divine is the best story released this decade in any medium. I want to be clear here. People often confuse favourite for best when talking critically. I am not saying that … Read more
This Father’s Day, broadcaster Nadine Higgins reckons with her complex relationship with her estranged Dad who passed away last year. When someone you love dies, people console you for your loss. But in truth, we lost each other some time ago. Long before that Sunday when I woke inexplicably at 3.30 am, anxious but unaware … Read more
Vana Manasiadis wrote a collection of poetry in the wake of her mother’s death. In this essay, ahead of her appearance at the Going West festival, she argues that as a nation Aotearoa needs to learn to make space for mourning. When Mum died in Athens, I cried loudly and publicly and was held up … Read more
Mark Longley on his new podcast Death and what inspired him to tackle one of our last taboos: what we do when someone dies. This story was first published on Newshub. I was at a social function about three months after my daughter Emily died and I was talking to a guy I knew, but not well. … Read more
Marion McLeod reviews Late in the Day, a “smooth and sinuous and subtle” new novel by Tessa Hadley We begin with a death, a very good place to start. Where better to assemble and introduce family and friends? What more useful springboard for exploring their relationships? Tessa Hadley does all this superbly, with economy, elegance … Read more
In the final instalment of our Money Talks series, freelancers and sprightly young women Tess Nichol and Alice Webb-Liddall talk about the necessity of making a will, despite both being under 30. Most of us couldn’t say when or how we’ll kick the bucket, but just about the only thing we know for sure in … Read more
The Monday Extract: Christchurch coroner Marcus Elliott writes a personal essay about death, grief, and mercy in a new book about dying in New Zealand. Across New Zealand on a Saturday morning, people are playing netball or cricket, mowing the lawn, buying fruit, reading the paper, checking Facebook, living life. I am at my desk at … Read more
Many of us have suffered the terror of a beetroot poo, but few of us ever talk about our experience. Hayden Donnell says it’s time to bring this important issue into the light. Maybe it hasn’t happened to you yet. But it will. One day, after using the toilet, you’ll glance down and experience a … Read more
In a beautiful personal essay, Neesha Bremner writes of her grandmother’s past and her journey to the place she was happiest. In my carry on luggage is a little grey plastic box. On that little grey plastic box is a name. That name is my grandmother’s. The little grey box is filled with her ashes. … Read more
There are a handful of dead bodies in the Auckland Hilton and Don Rowe has seen them all. The controversial Body Worlds Vital exhibition is a powerful meditation on mortality and death, he writes. “We do not see things as they are,” goes the old Talmudic phrase, “We see them as we are.” How then … Read more
Grief is tough to navigate, wherever you come from. An incident involving the public sprinkling of ashes started a conversation this week on cultural belief versus the freedom to mourn however you need to. Spinoff Ātea editor Leonie Hayden talks to funeral director Francis Tipene about the tikanga around ashes and cremation. On Tuesday night … Read more
New verse by Wellington writer Rachel McAlpine. But when? Most of us are afraid of a slow fade, a late grave. Most of us equate old age with panic and despair and things we could not bear. We say, Not us! No way! We want to be hit by a bus. … Read more
Two years ago, Dorothy McLean received a call that turned her life upside down. Then, out of tragedy, came hope. Sunday 14th February, 2016. Valentines Day. Work at Moore Wilson’s was chaos – frantic boyfriends rushed to buy chocolates and candy hearts. By 10am, we’d sold out of roses. Unknown to me, this stressful but … Read more
Murdoch Stephens saw Mount Eerie play in Krakow, visited Auschwitz, and wrote about how to listen to songs of unimaginable tragedy. What are the limits of processing grief through a song? Love is easy. The performer is either in love or out of it, so, for most of us, there’s no problem with identifying with … Read more
An essay about being a daughter, being a parent, and protecting your future self from the past. By Laurel Hilton. We were driving round the bend in a 100 km/h zone. It was roughly in the vicinity where I did my driving test as a very pregnant 32 year-old, graduating from a Texan to New … Read more
All evidence points to one hard fact: it is incredibly improbable that you will remain alive. Hayden Donnell recommends either signing up for life insurance or fleeing to an apocalypse bunker this very minute. Are you reading this? Congratulations. Somehow you’re not dead. Good luck keeping it that way. Right now 11 major organ systems … Read more
A select committee review into assisted dying is coming up, and all signs point to a foregone conclusion. Former caregiver Talia Marshall recalls her time working in a rest home, where the debate has a very different meaning. I remember trying to a watch a VHS copy of Anne of Green Gables with my grandparents in my grandads … Read more
In which philosopher Raymond Bradley ponders whether any part of us survives in any meaningful way when we’re dead. What happens to us when we die? Is survival of our bodily deaths a real possibility? Ask yourself, first, how you conceive of survival. What would it be like for you yourself to survive your bodily death? … Read more