Shorty Street Scandal: TK’s Take on Time Travel, Dead Fish and Sexy Stripper Beasts

Please enjoy this excellent episode of Shorty Street Scandal, wherein James Mustapic recaps the past week of Ferndale hijinks. This week? TK doesn’t understand time travel or 3D printing, Wendy has a mid-life crisis and Murray drinks himself stupid: Never far from a strange, misconstrued conspiracy, TK did not take very well to the concept of 3D printing this … Read more

The Simpsons: Is it Time to Put Springfield Out to Pasture?

Josh Drummond makes a heartfelt plea for Simpsons fans to cho-cho-choose to put the show out of its misery. On May 14, 2015, my bosom swelled with an unlikely emotion: hope. The news had just broken that Harry Shearer looked like he was leaving The Simpsons. Shearer is the voice of some of the show’s best-loved, most … Read more

Inside the Lightbox: New to Lightbox in May/June – Family Feuds and Fake Reality

Inside the Lightbox is a sponsored feature where we mine the extensive Lightbox catalogue. This week, we look at five of the best new shows that arrived in May and are coming in June. Community (Season Five, May 1) Legendary showrunner funny man Dan Harmon is back for the fifth season of Community, where we reconvene with … Read more

Outlander Recap: Jamie and Claire Have the Last Huzzah in ‘To Ransom a Man’s Soul’

Tara Ward recaps the final episode of Outlander season one, wherein the coos save the day and Jamie and Claire look towards rebuilding and smouldering.  At last glance, Jamie Fraser was trapped in the living hell that was Wentworth Prison – with Black Jack Randall using his tongue to sign his name across Jamie’s back. Thankfully, … Read more

Competition: Watch Lightbox Somewhere Weird – And the Winners Are…

Announcing the triumphant winners of our Lightbox mobile devices competition, who bravely took TV into the great outdoors and made the world their lounge. Our May Lightbox competition asked you noble television fans to take TV outside of the house on your compatible mobile devices, and find the perfect setting your favourite Lightbox show. The … Read more

Podcast: The Brilliantly Soapy Drama and Amazing Headwear of Empire

The Spinoff’s Alex Casey and Duncan Greive are joined by freelance writer and critic Dominic Corry to discuss the first three episodes of ‘Empire’, a new show centering around an ‘urban’ music label’s dynastic tensions. It’s become an enormous hit in the US, thanks to a mixture of excellent casting, boldly soapy style and a … Read more

A Field Guide: Behind the Curtain of Romance Reality in Unreal

Alex Casey tells you all you need to know about UnREAL, the Lightbox-exclusive drama set behind the scenes of a dating show that will appeal to Bachelor fans and reality naysayers alike.  What’s the story? UnREAL is a comedy-drama set behind the scenes of a Bachelor-style dating show called Everlasting. It’s an easily recognisable setting, … Read more

Dancing with the Stars: Power Rankings, Week One – Gang Signs, Butt Flashes and Mad Maz

Alex Casey delivers her first power rankings for Dancing With the Stars NZ, including Pam Corkery’s boob jiggling, Simon Barnett’s spray tan and Shane Cameron’s meat hands. Dancing With the Stars came samba-ing (and Simba-ing, weirdly) back onto our screens this week after a six year hiatus that approximately nobody had noticed. Ten celebrities. Ten … Read more

Telling Our Stories: Is ‘Road Cops’ the New Campbell Live?

It’s 7pm, it’s local content, it starts with a well-presented white guy driving around in a fast car. Joe Nunweek asks – did we get the 7pm show we deserved? Nature hates a void, so let us watch Road Cops reruns forever, and let us enjoy more motoring mayhem and unlawful adventures on New Zealand’s … Read more

Podcast: Dancing With the Stars, Episode One – Pod Like There’s Nobody Listening

Jane Yee, Duncan Greive and Alex Casey foxtrot reluctantly back into the podcasting arena with their recap of the first week of Dancing With the Stars NZ 2015. We walked into this with clear eyes and full hearts, knowing it was a terrible idea. But if it was bad enough for MediaWorks, then it was bad enough for … Read more

Stevie TV: The Changing Faces of John Campbell

Stevie TV is a monthly column by Steve Braunias. In this instalment, he recalls the many faces of John Campbell through the ages. The final of Campbell Live on Friday night marks the end of an era which encompasses the entire history of New Zealand since the coming of Captain Cook. The show, and its genial … Read more

Shorty Street Scandal: Expensive Organic Vegetables and a New Take on the Santa Suit

Please enjoy this excellent episode of Shorty Street Scandal, wherein James Mustapic recaps the past week of Ferndale hijinks. This week? Harry Warner becomes Harriet the Spy, Damo goes Robert Durst and fruit prices go up the wazoo: Harry-et the Spy has been doing some serious leg work in the snoop department. Watching his druggie neighbours (Paul Williams, probably) … Read more

The Campbell Live Diaries: Seven Nights of Selfies and Belated Epiphanies

Guilty of being an apathetic audience member in the target demographic, Josh Drummond sat down and diarised a week of Campbell Live. HAMLET He was a man, take him for all in all, I shall not look upon his like again. HORATIO My lord, I think I saw him yesternight. Campbell Live! Campbell Live, the … Read more

Monitor: Like an Arrow Through the Heart – Why Do We Love to Hate-Watch?

Aaron Yap reflects on his own recent hate-watching of Arrow, Under the Dome and Catfish, and attempts to get to the bottom of this bizarre viewing phenomenon. I’m currently watching Arrow and I sort of hate it. It’s the first of the current, intimidatingly large batch of superhero shows I’ve dipped into. An adaptation of a … Read more

Outlander: From Shifty Eyes to Sharpened Six Packs – Outlander’s Top Ten Moments

With Outlander on hiatus this week before the finale, Tara Ward recaps her top ten favourite moments from the series so far from perverse back-licking to the angriest of chins. This series of Outlander has been a cracking adventure, filled with battles, blood, bigamy and bow-chicka-wow-wow – and we’ve still one episode to go! Before … Read more

24 Hours of Heartland: Farewelling Shakespearean Wonder Dogs and Bidet Salesmen

With Heartland in it’s final, feeble week of life, Calum Henderson sat down and watched one day’s worth of nostalgic programming.  TVNZ Heartland is dying. At midnight on the 31st of May, the national nostalgia channel will shut down, taking with it our chances of ever again opportunistically stumbling upon a classic episode of Mucking … Read more

Review: Not All is Lost For TV3 – Teina Pora Speaks Out in 3D’s Debut

Alex Casey reviews the debut episode of TV3’s new current affairs show 3D, wherein Teina Pora gave his first on-camera interview since his release from prison.  After a rough week post-Campbell fallout, TV3 ended on somewhat of a high with their new Sunday current affairs show 3D. With award-winning journalists Samantha Hayes and Duncan Garner at the … Read more

Music Monday: Industry Realism, Band Tensions and How Popstars Had the X Factor

In the wake of the X Factor NZ finale, Claire Adamson rewatches Popstars – and discovered much more compelling insights into the world of manufactured superstardom.  The weird thing about rewatching Popstars – the Kiwi show that started it all – is the fact that it’s not a reality tv show as we know them today. It’s … Read more

A Field Guide to: The Puffy-Sleeved, Blood-Soaked Madness of the Lizzie Borden Chronicles

Here is all you need to know about The Lizzie Borden Chronicles before picking up an axe and hacking into the pulpy period drama. What’s the story? The Lizzie Borden Chronicles is a fictionalised account of a fascinating true story. In 1892, Lizzie Borden’s stepmother and father were hacked to death with an axe in their own bed. … Read more

My Life in TV: Being Buried Alive with Days of Our Lives’ Suzanne Rogers

Alex Casey chats to Suzanne Rogers, better known as Maggie Horton from Days of Our Lives, about what it’s like to be on a soap opera for 42 years and counting. It’s a very weird thing to be sitting in your dressing gown in Auckland, waiting on the phone to talk to a soap star in LA … Read more

Spotlightbox: Alex and Duncan Talk About the Bonkers World of Days of Our Lives

Alex and Duncan give in to the manic soft-focus charm of Days of Our Lives, and urge you to get involved in the sprawling sordid soap. Days of Our Lives is one of the world’s longest-running soap operas, laden with love triangles, random resurrections and drenched in alcohol. We sat down and tried to make … Read more

Campbell Live: What this Means for MediaWorks, and for Our Media

When big name broadcasters have left their networks in the past it has been chasing vast sums of money, or with the kind of smugness which can only come from knowing you’ve just received the most golden of handshakes. The godly authority of their bully pulpits seemed to mean never worrying about job security. So … Read more

Campbell Live: The NZX Factor – Driven by Mazda, Driven Out by MediaWorks

Finlay Macdonald on the imminent order from MediaWorks to pack up the Mazda, and how recent ratings successes were not enough to save Campbell Live.  The writing was on the wall the moment John Campbell got behind the wheel of that Mazda and drove it through the opening titles of his show. It’s one thing to … Read more

Recap: Campbell Live – Why We’re Not Strangers Anymore

After today’s news that John Campbell is leaving TV3, Alex Casey recaps the perfectly apt episode of Campbell Live that followed. It happened today. Just as I was lazily photoshopping John Key’s hand to stroke Toni Street’s hair (for another comparably inane story sure to see the light of day soon). “Holy shit,” asked Duncan, “has John … Read more

Which TVNZ Presenter Let John Key Style Her Hair? A Spinoff Investigation

In response to the news that John Key was dared by an anonymous TVNZ presenter to style her hair (and obliged), Alex Casey speculates as to who shares ombré tips with our country’s PM.  Yesterday the news that John Campbell was leaving TV3 shook the internet to its very core, burying all other news deep under … Read more

Struggle Street: How the “Scum Zoo” of Struggle Street Became a Ratings Smash

Finlay McDonald looks at the emerging international television phenomenon known as ‘poverty porn’, and wonders how long we’ll have to wait for a New Zealand version. Sydney’s sprawling west contains some of the best-named suburbs known to humankind: Blacktown, Punchbowl and, my firm favourite, Rooty Hill. Each would make a fine title for a gritty … Read more

Throwback Thursday: Taylor Swift Spills Bad Blood of Her Own in CSI

In light of her new music video and dominance of the entire world, Alex Casey revisits Taylor Swift’s less-celebrated cameo appearance on CSI.  All this flat-out commotion about Taylor Swift’s new star-stuffed ‘Bad Blood’ video has distracted us all from her most stellar onscreen performance – her dramatic cameo role on CSI. It’s infinitely more violent than … Read more

Recap: Jetskis, Vegetables and Gender Roles in the Young Farmer Final

Duncan Greive awoke early on Sunday to milk the first episode of The Road to the Young Farmer of the Year so that his fellow city slickers could stay sound asleep. Last Sunday, at the farmer-friendly hour of 6.30am, The Road to the Young Farmer of the Year Final debuted on One. Seeing as The … Read more